2025-06-06T15:30:00Z

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Editor’s Note: Help is available if you or someone you know is struggling with suicidal thoughts or mental health issues. In the United States, you can call or text 988 to reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. For those outside of the US, the International Association for Suicide Prevention and Befrienders Worldwide can provide contact information for crisis centers around the globe.

In a revealing new documentary titled Billy Joel: And So It Goes, the legendary musician candidly discusses a tumultuous period in his life when he faced overwhelming emotional struggles. The film premiered at the prestigious Tribeca Festival in New York City earlier this week and shines a light on Joel's personal battles, including two suicide attempts that he attributes to a complicated affair with the wife of his bandmate.

The documentary recounts Joel’s time as a member of the band Attila, which he formed with his close friend Jon Small. This friendship took a dramatic turn when Joel moved into a shared home with Small, his wife Elizabeth Weber, and their young son. The film reveals that Weber and Joel experienced what she described as a “slow burn” attraction, which eventually culminated in their affair.

Reflecting on this tumultuous episode, Joel expressed his feelings of guilt surrounding the affair. He was acutely aware of the consequences of his actions, stating, “I felt very, very guilty.” The affair led to a violent confrontation with Small when Joel confessed his feelings for Weber, resulting in the disbanding of Attila.

“They had a child. I felt like a homewrecker,” Joel revealed to the filmmakers. “I was just in love with a woman and I got punched in the nose, which I deserved. Jon was very upset. I was very upset.” The aftermath left Joel reeling emotionally, as Weber chose to leave, plunging him into a downward spiral characterized by alcohol abuse and homelessness. Struggling with severe depression, he recalled a moment of despair: “I figured, ‘That’s it. I don’t want to live anymore.’ I was just in a lot of pain, and it was sort of like why hang out, tomorrow is going to be just like today is, and today sucks.”

During this dark time, Joel attempted to end his life multiple times. His sister, Judy Molinari, who was working as a medical assistant at the time, provided him with sleeping pills. Tragically, he ingested an entire bottle and slipped into a coma that lasted several days. Reflecting on this harrowing experience, Molinari shared, “I went to go see him in the hospital, and he was laying there white as a sheet. I thought that I’d killed him.”

His second attempt involved drinking a bottle of cleaning fluid, which, in an ironic twist of fate, led to Small saving his life once more by rushing him to the hospital despite their fractured friendship. “Even though our friendship was blowing up, Jon saved my life,” Joel admitted.

After these incidents, Joel sought professional help, a decision that he credits with enabling him to channel his emotions into his music. This cathartic process has not only contributed to his prolific career but has also allowed him to connect with millions of fans around the world.

Years later, Joel and Weber would reconnect and ultimately marry, though their union lasted from 1973 to 1982. Despite their separation, Weber continues to express her admiration for Joel. Recently, she supported him during a difficult period, as he announced the cancellation of upcoming tour dates to seek treatment for normal pressure hydrocephalus (NPH), a serious condition affecting brain health. In an interview with E! News at the documentary's premiere, Weber praised Joel, stating, “He’s worked so hard all of his life. I’ve never known anybody who worked harder than he did in all those years we were together and working together.”

Billy Joel: And So It Goes is scheduled to air on HBO in July, offering an intimate look at the life of a musical icon who has faced his share of hardships and emerged stronger.